One fourth of July party we had on the farm, and had a fireworks show, as good as they do in town (the old man always bought the illegal good stuff)
So he's setting them off and one goes haywire starts toward the crowd (he's on the hill) everyone grabs their chairs and starts running, all but the old Uncle with a walker that had been trying to get to a seat, and it has already been 10 min. he was moving at a snails pace, and not one of us drunk idiots ran to help him. (no Uncle was harmed in this story, he just narrowly escaped)
Later that night my old man threw a firecracker wheel in the bon fire, and we all ran for cover, while he laughed his ass off

This thing was suppose to be hung up, but he couldn't get it to light so he just tossed it in the fire, it was shooting in all directions, and spinning. Once we were well out of the way it was a woot.